POLLUTING

i am seeing light again
have i almost forgotten you
you're full of inconsiderations but i 
still love you, do i
try to hate you try to hate you
this will cure me forget you
hate is strong hate is love
hate is everything that is my god help me

i can see that far muffled light
ripple with my swimming tail
it lights up as i get closer
but the dim screen never leaves

waiting for it to end
waiting for it to end

There was not one day that I was neglected. Just as I was a part of her, she was a part of me. Oh, how unworthy she would have been without such a flexible tongue and such precious, soft lips. How my voice enchanted her customers, and how they loved to see her smile. How I helped her so and yet she didn’t appreciate me; she left my arms dry and chapped in the mornings and wiped me with coarse paper towels after she ate. I often empathize with my neighbors, her eyes; we were both helpless and blinking coldly at this world. 

As always, that morning was cruel with coldness and I felt frost-bitten. I couldn’t identify where my body borders with her face anymore, and every inch of me was aching and bitter. She finally woke up to her alarm and I prayed that she wouldn’t yawn, but she did and just as I had expected, my skin finally ripped. How the wound throbbed with the cold air! I felt blood trickle down my side and was quickly wiped off by her hand. But that didn’t stop me from crying. I cried and cried until she sat up from her bed. 

“Dammit,” she said and started brushing her tongue up against my tears.
I felt violated.

She started brushing her teeth and water healed my sorrow for a while as it washed away my tears. Then, after she washed her face and put her contacts on, she started her daily routine of make-up. First foundation, then mascara, blush, and finally she smudged an oily stick on my body making it look unnaturally shiny. She then puckered at her reflection in the mirror and I knew she was once again showing off the best trait on her whole face – me. Although I was sickened by the foul smelling chemicals on my body, I was a bit proud of her favoring of me. She then started changing into her clothes, a sleeveless silk top with black laces on its trim and a black leather skirt short enough to reveal half her butt. She was wearing black lingerie on the inside and a fur trimmed petty coat on the outside. Finally, she put on high-heels pointy enough to kill someone and left the house. 

天花板是工業革命後的灰暗

電線交錯著橫豎爬行的水管

那根一柱擎天的煙囪

帶走了早晨咖啡香的懶散

我們有很多群人在爭一樣東西 是東西嗎

我跟著一位高雅的女士 和一位骯髒的男人

我們是跑還是追呢

後來似乎結束了 我們之前的馬車拋棄在泥濘中

他是如此的焦急, 看著我肚皮上的指痕, 像腳印採進沙般樣的沉澱

你看不見嗎? 你怎麼看不見?? 他抓著我的手不顧一切的向外衝

他要你... 

外頭的森林多麼漆黑, 瘋子樣的我們像風一樣的跑, 為了一股莫名的恐懼奔馳著...

She stumbled across a raccoon footprint upon his upper back on one of those nights they tossed and turned in bed with her hand beneath his shirt and face in his chest. She wandered her fingertips back and forth on the little dent to let them consume its freshness that it finally caught his attention. 

“What are you doing?” 
“What is that? Did your mom drop you when you were baby?”
“Yeah.”

Their conversation dwelled as long as the time she spent questioning the print’s origin, and ended abruptly following his absent-minded agreement. She took her hand off the mysterious dimple and resumed stroking without remark, breathing in the calming rhythms from his nose, and her mind deviated off the subject as exhaust overcame her curiosity.

一位陌生的中年男子, 像我的繼父. 我討厭跟他處在同一間房間, 尷尬的氣氛.

門鈴突然想了, 在一個不常有人來拜訪的家, 是驚喜也是解脫.

我從門中的小洞試圖看著外來的人, 卻什麼也看不清. 晃來晃去. 後來一之骯髒的大手把它給遮住了.

管他的. 就開了吧. 至少有趣點.